explique-

Dear Alastair,

So you finally replied me.
Finally, on MSN.

Except the only problem is that, it hasn't made anything clearer for me.

You won't tell me what started this, what any of it is supposed to mean or why you sent that bloody message to begin with!

"Can't you just not know?" You asked me.
Like it was something as trivial as a surprise present or something.
You try answering that.

It's not so much so not knowing, to be honest.
It's everything being put together.

Really.
Thanks for fucking stringing me along.
Thanks for tossing rubbish at me just for the bloody heck of it.

I've never understood you? Is that it?
Really now.

Well then, I suppose it would be just a tad bit worrying if I did start understanding you then.

You're so fucking unbelievable Alastair.
And it scares me to think that at one time, I was sure I understood you best.
Never thinking for a moment, that you might actually just say that to a half dozen others.

But oh really now.
I'm being silly.

Didn't I say I couldn't be bothered? Because i really can't.
Not anymore.


Enjoy yourself in Penang.
Have a nice life Alastair.


All my love,
Charis Vera