Friday, August 26, 2011

Expiration date

I'm always afraid of wanting too much.
Often, I'm happy where I am, and I can stay put. The problem comes with looking for what comes next.

Sometimes, I don't get people.
"I'm not the marrying sort, I don't think. I can't see myself in it." I'd say. And I get this look. This, 'Oh child, aren't you too young to make hasty decisions like that?' -type of look.
Or this, 'Now now, don't speak too early.'- type of look.
And then at some point, for whatever reason, I get to thinking,
"Hmm, maybe I could..." But oh, people people, don't hurt yourself as you make a break for it now.
Good God, what is it that people want? I seem to be at the perfect age to be answering these questions wrongly.

I'll just put things into perspective for myself though-
1) Do I want to get married right now?
Hell no. No, I don't. No. No.
2) Do I want to eventually?
Uh, honest to God, I really don't know. Not at this point. I'm definitely not saying that I won't ever. But it depends on a whole lot of things.
3) What about The Girlfriend?
I am very happy and I feel like I can do this for quite a while- living, being and being able to be, while with each other. We both do. But I don't know about anything else.

Sometimes, like today, I am randomly struck by our expiration date. We never said we'd be forever, and I like that we agree on things like that.
Maybe I wasn't prepared for your reply being that sharp. I suppose I'm just used to having responses like that come from me instead of the other round. So perhaps I'm a tad taken aback.

In regards to weddings and proposals and the patterns on our paper doilies, we'll leave that to Future Charis.
Because honest to God, I'm perfectly fine with what I've got right now.

I've got Bird.
And we're just thinking of Buttons and Timo being our witnesses.
I might not get to have kids, but we'll make do with the furry ones.

No comments: